Talk to Fa

Once, I was talking to someone I was seeing. He brought up a topic I was interested in but wasn’t very familiar with. I was honest and comfortable about my lack of knowledge. He then said to me, “You should know this,” in a sarcastic tone. How condescending, I thought. Maybe he put me on a pedestal in some way and was disappointed by the unrealistic expectation he had of me. But I believe we have friends and encounters because they come and teach us new things, and I like learning in real life from real people. I am not at all embarrassed by my ignorance. Later, with some time, I realized maybe it was he who had felt pressured to be competent his whole life. I was reflecting his shadow back to him. Whether with this man or others, I often experience people projecting themselves onto me. Usually, they are men. It’s really fucking annoying, but I doubt this will stop happening to me. It is part of my destiny and purpose. Although I used to feel hurt by these unwanted projections, I now understand it’s not about me, but about them. I also know these people will never be the same. Crossing paths with me is a life-changing event. I hope they are healing.