It’s cool to be able to do something I was too scared to even try. Back in August 2023, I wrote about my headstand progress and how fear was getting in the way of me going up vertically, rather than lack of strength or balance. Now that I’ve made friends with fear, I’m also realizing the importance of upper body strength in being able to hold the posture. I love new discoveries like this through a new challenge. I love that part about myself.
So I’ve been practicing a headstand for a while.
I got back into a regular practice of yoga around 2018 when I moved to a new neighborhood where I found a yoga studio I love. This is in Los Angeles.
I caught covid in late 2022. Then I came home to Japan in order to heal and recover from the serious decline in my health and well-being. I’d been away from my family for 3 years prior.
For the past 6 months, I’ve been practicing the headstand more intensively and intentionally than ever. And yesterday, with my knees bent (baby steps!), I was able to float both of my feet in the air for a few long seconds for the first time.
The headstand was always hard for me for two reasons. One, a lack of strength in my upper body. I’ve been training my upper body and core for this. Two, fear. I couldn’t kick the fear of vertical inversion. Everything about it was terrifying for me. It was psychological. The fear was limiting me, and I hated that.
Something happened to how I handled fear after a certain incident.
Recently, I spoke out against the untouchable masculine in my family. I say it casually, but this was monumental for me and my family, as he’s left immense emotional scars on me and others, for life.
This experience changed something in me. Something popped. I felt a level-up, and it feels fantastic.
Photo by Lauren W.