It’s not always about the thing we are going after. Instead, let us ask these questions:

• Why is this thing happening to us?
• Why now?
• Who do we encounter in the journey?
• What are the roles of these people in our lives?
• Have we been in their shoes in different scenarios?
• What does the thing want us to realize and learn from?
• How do we evolve from the lessons?
• How do we apply them in our lives?
• What do we have to let go of?
• Who do we have to let go of?
• How do we use the revelation to unleash our powers?
• How do we love and trust ourselves despite all of this?

#healing

This morning, I woke up in tears. I’d already been crying in my dream.

In the dream, I was sitting across from my family at a long table, lined with crisp white linen. Me on one side, them on the other side. It felt like me against them. We were in a dining car on a train. The train was running along the coast. Outside the train was a beautiful, peaceful scene. Inside the train, my family was shouting at me. They were saying harsh, heartless things to me, just as they sometimes used to do in the waking life. They took out hefty cooking knives. One by one, they started throwing them at me. “You are crazy!” I shouted at them as I kept dodging the knives in the air. They continued to throw more knives at me. I begged them to stop, but they weren’t listening. They were too busy throwing knives at me.

When I woke up, I felt just… incredibly sad. I was coming to terms with the hurt I felt all my life. I carried their emotional burden on my shoulders. I tolerated their projected pain and anger. These are the things I kept brushing off growing up because I didn’t want to see my family as villains, and I somehow thought I deserved such treatment.

The other day, I heard someone say that most of us don’t hurt each other on purpose. I felt that. My family didn’t intend to hurt me, I’m sure, or I hope. But the damage was made in me. Words were said to me. The dream forced me to relive and feel all those difficult emotions that I didn’t get to accept and feel when I first experienced them. This time, I knew I wasn’t responsible for their emotions. This time, I wasn’t going to protect their feelings over my own.

I stayed in bed for a while to process the dream. I felt more tears in my eyes. I cried a bit more.

#dreams #healing

We buy things we don’t need  We drive cars we can’t afford   We go to places social media says are cool We invest in neighborhoods we don’t resonate with We do drugs to feel better for the moment  We drink alcohol to forget We consume destructive music and entertainment  We date people we don’t love We stay friends with people who flake on us  We eat food with no nutritional value  We eat “healthy” food unfit for our designs  We overwork to avoid facing ourselves We stay in careers we think we should be in  We escape to exotic destinations  We stay busy to feel important  We spend our time and energy on the wrong people We blame our problems on other people  We hold on to our outdated beliefs really hard

Then we hit rock bottom

We realize we are not well  We have no idea who we are  None of these external factors makes us happy  We can’t keep escaping  We can’t keep going like this anymore

This is when we break

Everything we’ve held on to no longer works  We experience a massive amount of loss  In relationships, health, jobs, and things we own

The loss ends up working in our favor It’s spring cleaning time Everything that holds us back, is out  To create more space for new things to enter

We encounter people who challenge and test us They are here to urge our growth We encounter people who instantly feel like family  They are here to remind us we are not alone in our journeys  And that we deserve to love and be loved

We finally start facing ourselves  It’s uncomfortable  But we can’t go back  We have no other choice  So we keep going inward  The darkness of the tunnel feels like forever

Then we start seeing the light We start remembering who we are  Who we want to be  Who we don’t want to be moving forward What we like  What we don’t like

We realize all our problems stem from our childhoods We revisit our painful pasts  We work through them with grace and courage  This time, we got this  Our awareness is on another level  We’ve been collecting the dots this whole time   We finally get to connect them  It’s time to feel whole

We’ve reached the state of inner peace We accept where we are and who we are We accept the painful pasts We accept the wrongdoings of other people We see ourselves in others We surrender and love

Our journeys continue.

#healing

Every night, I look at pictures taken a year ago today, two years ago today, three years ago today, and so on.

Five years ago today, my hands were covered in oozing eczema caused by a combination of anxiety, extreme stress, and an imbalanced diet. I was pouring all of my energy into things that weren’t mine. I was depressed and burned out. I was frustrated. I didn’t know who I was. I kept convincing myself, “This is what I want.” It wasn’t. By the end of that year, my ex-husband and I started living separately. We’d been together for fourteen years.

Four years ago today, I hiked to the summit of the Acatenango volcano in Guatemala and saw the sunrise. It was cold, misty, and unbelievably majestic. The climb was brutal because of the loose volcanic gravel. You take three steps forward and two steps back. My intuition had told me I needed to do something physically challenging to reach a particular realization, and I did. A couple of weeks later, I finally had the courage to tell my ex I wanted a divorce.

Three years ago today, I was healing from a sliced finger and a broken heart. I was supposed to meet and have a conversation with someone significant to me. The night before the alleged convo, I sliced my finger while cooking and spent all night at the ER. The incident must have been an ominous premonition. The conversation didn’t happen, leaving me saddened, unfulfilled, and unsettled.

Two years ago today, I’d been back home in Japan for two months. I caught COVID in late 2022 and needed to heal and recover under the care of my family. I had all these weird autoimmune symptoms and ended up staying for seven long months. I thought I was only staying for a couple of weeks at the most. During those months, I worked out and sweated it out, changed my diet completely, and rebuilt my foundation. I tackled the root causes of my health issues through trial and error without relying on prescriptions and temporary solutions. I also made painful visits to the past and faced my childhood traumas. It was some of the most emotionally difficult, lonely, and uncomfortable times of my life.

A year ago today, I was involved with a man who questioned my worth like no other. With him, I applied the lessons I’d learned from facing my parent wound head-on. In the brief period with him, I finally realized that what I knew to be okay wasn’t okay. This involved unlearning and re-learning of my lifelong beliefs. I was so overwhelmed once I reached the revelation that I couldn’t do anything for a month. I needed to heal. That was heavy but necessary.

Today, I am looking back at the past five years of my life. I am thankful for all the things I got to enjoy, experience, and overcome. I feel light, optimistic, and peaceful. I know that I earned this peace. I faced my demons. I didn’t run away from what scared me. I love the person I’m becoming. I love discovering unexplored parts of myself. I keep shedding and evolving.

#stories #healing

All my life, I have been searching for a teacher, mentor, role model, and inspiration I could only find guidance in nature, not in human form The trees listen to me The water purifies me The sun heals and vitalizes me The moon allows me to reflect The rocks connect me to my ancient memories No human could help me And then I realized I was the teacher I was the mentor I was the role model and the inspiration.

#healing

Or do you find comfort in associating yourself with those who give you a false sense of belonging, security, and strength?

#healing #vibes

When healing people through my touch, I experience energy exchange, especially if you are open and receptive to the work.

Through my intuition and my touch, I receive downloads about your energy, feelings, and the whereabouts of your journey. It is not something I do on purpose. It just happens.

Intuitive Touch, my healing practice, is a somatic and visceral experience. As the receiver, your body is gently wrapped in my hands with love, warmth, and intention.

I intend to hold a safe space for you, literally and metaphorically, generating warming sensations in and onto your body and creating a deep sense of acceptance. This helps you soften your heart, body, and nervous system.

When you allow yourself to relax and come back into your body, you can tap into parts of yourself you’ve neglected for a long time. Now, you can have a conversation with yourself that you’ve been meaning to have.

That is when your energy enters my consciousness. Sometimes, healing someone open and receptive makes me cry because I feel your effort and desire to break out of your shell. I feel your inner child buried deep within you. Other times, I may see a vision of you in my dreams.

Feeling is healing. It’s both the most fundamental and crucial step of our healing journeys. We accept who we are and where we are. And we start heading to the most authentic version of ourselves.

#healing #offerings

Growing up, I was encouraged to eat everything. As a result, I became a good, non-picky eater. However, I am learning that my body is just not happy with certain foods.

Spicy chilis make my stomach upset.

Nightshade vegetables, non-raw milk dairies, shellfish, and blue fish make my skin itch.

Overprocessed gluten inflames my muscles and joints.

Refined sugar gives me a brain fog. I feel weak and stupid after consuming sugar.

Coffee makes me jittery. I used to think that was normal, but I didn’t want that to be how I felt every morning.

The morning after consuming alcohol, my skin feels dehydrated like a desert. I see wrinkles on my face that I normally never see.

So I’ve removed these foods from my diet. Of course, I make exceptions from time to time.

Some of these foods were harder to let go of than others. I used to love hand-pouring coffee. I looked forward to the ritual every morning. Weighing the beans. Folding and setting the filter. Pouring water slowly as the beans bloom and the aroma fills the air. Many evenings, I enjoyed a glass or two of red wine. Sometimes I’d sip on añejo tequila or mezcal. And I’d do that while watching the sunset or listening to music.

One thing about me, I do not like dwelling on the past and what’s no longer working for me. I enjoy adapting to new ways, and I did.

Now I am a very picky eater. I listen to my body and what it needs/does not, and I really like how I feel with and from what I eat.

#healing

I’ve been responding to the universe’s guidance and trying things that it presents to me. Apparently, acting is one of them.

This turned out to be such a healing and empowering opportunity. I am so delighted that the director Destiny found me and trusted me with the role.

What a privilege to be part of the collective energies of fellow artists and dreamers. I loved every moment.

I’m ready, universe. I want more new experiences. Bring them to me!

———

Short film Speech Therapist by Destiny Jaimes Carachure

Produced by Leaphea Sambath

Co-cast: Jenna Aranda

BTS photos by Diego Salvacion

Thank you to the entire team at CSULB

———

#healing #updates #shares

Hey beautiful souls, I’m now offering private healing sessions in my home in Highland Park, Los Angeles.

You’ll receive a combination of intuitive energy work and sensory touch therapy.

When I work on you, I scan your body, tap into my energy, and connect with yours through my touch. From there, I’ll intuitively know what to do with you. I will be there to hold a safe space for you, so you can come home to yourself. Maybe light a little fire in your heart, if you are open.

Since November, I’ve been volunteering as a healer in my friend and amazing yoga teacher Meg Shoemaker’s Healing Collective class at Kinship Yoga working on multiple people in each class a couple of times a week.

It’s been rewarding to have a direct impact on many people in front of my eyes. Some of them told me they felt seen for the first time in a while and the effect and feeling I brought to them were very special.

This is undoubtedly the most fulfilling work I’ve ever done in my life. It puts me in my element like nothing else. It comes in so naturally and almost effortlessly because it relies on my intuition. The culmination of my energy, my being, my gifts, and my love.

So take a journey with me. Here’s a link to book a session if you are interested. You will be in good hands with me.

Love, Fa

#healing #updates #offerings