My great-grandmother was a traveling psychic and a shaman.
I learned this for the first time just when I was about to leave home for the airport to return to LA. I’d been back home in Japan for 7 months for health recovery.
I never got to meet her, my great-grandmother. She was my father’s grandmother. I was told she was loved by her children and grandchildren. She would travel all over her town and perform rituals in people’s homes. She would use drums and other instruments and props as part of her spiritual rituals.
When I learned this, I felt the dots connecting within me. The dots I’ve been collecting as I move through life. They suddenly made sense. It’s in my blood, the gift. I’ve always felt that in my heart. In my soul.
When I was in my late 20’s, I was offered a full-time position at a global ad agency. It was my first six-figure salary.
I was given a glorious job title, doing creative work for renowned brands, in a posh office in Chicago’s River North neighborhood.
With the money, I was able to afford to shop and lunch at nearby spots every day and live comfortably.
Soon enough, I found myself feeling out of place, totally disconnected from everyone around me in the office.
The people were nice. I didn’t receive any direct treatment that was unpleasant. But there was something off about some of them. I couldn’t really put that into words at that time.
And I blamed myself for feeling that way because I was young and unable to trust my judgment. I felt guilty for not vibing with my colleagues and the atmosphere of the office.
Every morning, I dreaded going into the office. I felt so alienated although many “nice” people surrounded me.
A couple of months after my start date, I decided to make up a fake reason and resign from the job. I was terrified about lying just to quit. I didn’t want to burn any bridges.
Years went on. I saw a headline on LinkedIn. A head of an agency was accused of harassment and was fired, along with a few other men who partook in the action. It was the agency I lied to leave.
